Terms of Endearment

These are equally as interesting as nicknames. Where do they come from? "Honey" and "sweetie" make sense, as both things are sweet and sweet things are pleasant to the palate. Still, it's funny how we base terms of endearment on sugar and the physical sensation of taste. Sure, we taste each other when we kiss, but if that were the only criterion on which we based our little pet names, we'd call each other "orange juice" and "hamburger" and "beer breath," too, wouldn't we? I mean, we don't always taste like honey or other sweet things. Where the hell did "pumpkin" come from? I mean, it's cute, but still, what's it mean? "I love you, pumpkin." Translation: "I love you, round orange vegetable" ? Not exactly number 1 on the list of most flattering things to be called. Now "pumpkin pie" tastes good, but we don't call each other that, do we? We call each other "cutie-pie," though. How is a pie cute? If it's small. So, basically, a nice way of saying "small-pie," or a delicious treat that won't make you gain too much weight. As opposed to "large pie" or "heavy pie" or "thick pie," all of which are tasty but you may regret eating a whole one. So where the hell does pumpkin come from? Why not apple? It's smaller, which is almost always something women want to be, it's sweeter than a pumpkin and it also makes a delicious pie! It's generally been my experience that apple pie is actually more popular than pumpkin. But I have never heard "apple" used as a term of endearment. I believe a celebrity whose name escapes me named his/her daughter "apple," but that's another story.